Wednesday, June 15, 2011
I admit it. I'm a waffler. I hate making little decisions. I consider every angle, I research. I do unofficial surveys of interested parties. Then I decide after weeks, months or years of internal debate.
But once I decide something, it's usually set in stone. That is where I think I confuse people. I dither so much (I love the word dither) that people assume I have no strong opinions or that they can bully me.
The opposite is true. Most of the time, I don't care so you can have what you want. Making the right decision on big items is important to me so I think and choose with thought and care.
So when someone tries to push me off one of my few decided items, they meet a big, fat 'no'. Perhaps it's my fault because it's not clear to them but it is clear to me how I work. :)
Perhaps I'm getting older though because some part of me is starting to care less about making others happy if it makes me miserable.
Shouldn't we be like the oath of doctors? First, 'do no harm'. That's what I believe about life, 'first do no harm' and that includes to myself.
So I guess they'll just have to accept that I'll always dither and when I say 'no', I really mean no.
Or they can lump it (my mature side showing). :)